A guide to being a good client

What distinguishes a good client from a bad one? The CoSWAC team, which includes both clients and providers, has come up with the following list of recommendations:

  1. Do your homework. If the provider has a website or review board ad, read it thoroughly to note guidelines, donations, and other important information.
  2. Be prepared to give contact information, possibly references. This is a safety measure. Rest assured providers are well versed in the necessity of discretion. Remember that providers always have the right to refuse service; no one is entitled to an appointment.
  3. When talking on the phone, be calm and pleasant. Don’t go into specifics about activities. Set a date, time and place for your meeting. Consider taking your provider for dinner and/or drinks as the beginning part of the session.
  4. Do not try to haggle or bargain with the provider over the donation or services offered.
  5. Before the session, make sure you are clean – shower, fresh breath, clean clothes. If meeting at your home, please neaten up, put fresh linens on the bed, and provide clean towels and toiletries for your guest. If you are meeting at the provider’s incall, you may be asked to shower upon arrival. This is fairly common. Even if you are not asked to shower, always take a moment to freshen up (wash your hands, mouthwash, etc.).
  6. A gift, while not expected, is always appreciated. Many times, providers will have a wish list on their sites/ads.
  7. Be on time! If something happens to delay your arrival (e.g., traffic jam), call to apologize and let your provider know when you expect to be there. Expect to leave at the agreed-upon time.
  8. Upon arrival, place the full donation in a conspicuous place. (Many providers prefer not to have the donation handed to them.) Do not discuss the donation.
  9. Be on your best behavior. Treat your provider with courtesy and respect. Don’t ask probing or personal questions, or press for something they are not willing to do.
  10. Express your appreciation for the provider’s time, effort, and service. Tipping is especially encouraged.
  11. While some providers welcome reviews, many do not. Write one only if your provider explicitly consents to it. Don’t give a detailed “blow-by-blow” account, as this may cause any of a number of problems; focus on the positive feelings you had from your encounter. Never use the promise of a good review, or the threat of a bad one, to coerce a provider in any way.
  12. If you suspect a sex worker of being coerced in any way, or under age, notify a peer-led sex worker organization in your area (e.g., a chapter of SWOP-USA). We do not recommend contacting law enforcement, in the event you are mistaken.